The human experience of rejection is difficult, and we can all relate to this at some point in our lives. Being rejected by anyone is tough let alone being turned away by a loved one, it leaves you feeling empty, wounded and unloved. Rejection from others can definitely lead to “self-rejection” as you will start to treat yourself the same way other people are treating you.
It’s important to know and understand that your worth is not based on how other people treated you or because they failed to notice what a great person you are. You are always worthy regardless of how people treat you.
Rejection communicates to someone that they’re not loved or valued and unwanted which Just crucifies our feelings. Nobody wants to feel that way and it can do a lot of damage to a person.
“There’s a Psychological basis to the pain of rejection, too. Research shows that rejection triggers the same brain pathways that are activated when we experience physical pain”- Guy Winch PHD, psychologist, author and blogger. I always find making a list of the positive qualities you already have can reduce negative self-talk and it’s a way of affirming our worth. It’s also important to assess your own part in your rejection experience, because that will help you to learn and give you insight about what not to do next time.
Sometimes these people are merely “distractions” in your life, and they have no ultimate purpose. They’re actually getting in the way of your destiny and your goals. So, although it may feel like rejection and you’re hurt, please remember it can be a blessing in disguise. Everyone is not going to accept you and although we crave that from others, we need to first learn to accept ourselves. Some people are not going to be for you and that’s ok, you don’t need them to fulfill your destiny.
If you’re putting your precious time and energy into trying to win people over and if these people are not seeing the gift that you are, then let them go and feel relieved there gone “not rejected”. You don’t need to be chasing these people and letting them manipulate you, hoping that they’ll call and include you in their life, because the real people who genuinely care about you will light up when they see you, you will not have to force them for attention and your love shouldn’t feel like a burden.
Now don’t spend another minute trying to convince someone to be in your life, if you have to talk them into it “they are not for you they are a distraction”. Stay focused on your goals and on what you’re trying to accomplish. Some people only take withdrawals and never make any deposits.
Being rejected is hard enough! and it’s even worse to experience it when you already have low self-esteem. You become more vulnerable to it and it becomes more painful to deal with which will ultimately take longer to recover from. Therefore, people with higher self-esteem tend to be more resilient.
Fear of rejection is a strong emotion and it can often hold us back in all aspects of life, whether it’s love, career or family. It’s important to be truthful with yourself in these times so you don’t avoid situations out of fear because you’re concerned or because you don’t want to deal with being turned away.
The key to becoming more resilient is to build your self-esteem up. Remind yourself of your worth and how much you are loved! there are people who value you, care about you and “you do belong somewhere,” that constant reminder is so important it’s healing for your wounds. Rejection isn’t even always about you, sometimes it’s about the other individual so that’s also important to consider. Try putting yourself in their shoes and see if it’s really about you or not, be honest with yourself and this will help you in the healing process. Take as much time as you need to heal and let yourself go through the healing process.